September 21st, 2004

Photo, Gabriel's

Update from edited ICQ message

I realized recently that my job and my housing situation both suck in ways that I seem powerless to change other than by abandoning each of them as paradigms (which I can't really afford to do right now). Also, things between Ratha and I are kinda … weird. We talked for about an hour on the phone on Sunday, and it was very pleasant, but we were basically just bouncing things off one another, not really interacting. I don't know, when we do really interact it usually ends up being painful, so maybe that's for the best.

Yesterday I spent about $100 at Bed, Bath and Beyond, today I worked from home (and actually managed to do some work in spite of that, although mostly due to exchanging emails with Jason) and I got my new laptop, which is the same as the old (broken) one except it has built-in wireless and a slightly faster CPU. Oh, Ratha had planned to fly to Pittsburgh this past weekend, but didn't due to feeling sick and behind on work. That was actually kind of okay, particularly as there was a torrential downpour which also forced me to cancel my newer plans to go to a shooting range with Ed.

Mood summary: totally dead last week, sleeping late, not eating, not cleaning up, etc. A lot more alive the last few days. I hope that sticks—apathy is a pretty hard state from which to intentionally break free.